Archive for March, 2013


“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up.”

—- Neil Gaiman (The Sandman)

Who says, the season of love is monsoon or springs? The real season of love is examination time. That time when you probably are on study leave or are at the end of your college or school and about to go for a study leave. That is the time when you will love almost everything, if you aren’t a reader, you’ll find a sudden urge to read newspaper or novel, if you aren’t an avid Television freak, you would want to sit and watch T.V. endlessly because you just start to love it. You don’t love to sit idle, but you will fall in love with the state of staying idle for hours, love to stare at the walls, at birds, at trains (well, that happens to me because I stay in a track-facing building 😐 ). Its not just about inanimate and inert things but also for people. My past relationships most of the times have developed during examinations of mine or her’s. I fell in true love for someone right before my third year boards, uhmm, not may be true love, that’s harsh, call it true super and pure affection, or something like that (Shit, I miss her so much !!).

Doesn’t that happen to you as well? Not only love in that fashion, but don’t you really develop a strong love for friendship with different people during exam times? I have a friend, with whom, we talk only during exam days. Months go by, we see each other’s statuses (Happy, Sad, Troubled, so on) on Blackberry Messenger but won’t bother. But, Exams and we will be chatting and pacifying all the while. The friendship is such that we seem as closest friends, but then apparently we are nothing but exam-buddies (a specie of fuck-buddies, may be? There they get fucked and be together and here we get fucked and stay together :P)

So, in the midst of my fierce battle with Mumbai Local Commuters, to get into a Borivali Slow Train to go to my “Out-Station Examination Centre” at Gorai from Andheri, I got this passing thought. Don’t you feel the same? Don’t you feel the guitarist who play melodies when you are in love get time for you only when you have exams? Don’t you think, cool breeze that makes your hair fly which happens when you’re in love, is unusual to happen in summer? Don’t you think its some conspiracy by planners of our life to instill when we are genuinely in for studying or seriously want to give one exam without preparing your mind to “Dhapofy”? Don’t you think? Don’t you? Tell me, Do you think? TELL ME !!

This love, this knack of sitting idle all the while staring the wall or pages of your book, renders me to this condition every exam !! Bhagwan, Mujhe Sadbuddhi Do :/ !!

This love, this knack of sitting idle all the while staring at the wall or pages of your book, chatting away endlessly, renders me to this condition every exam !! Bhagwan, Mujhe Sadbuddhi Do :/ !!

Oh ! Paper Update? My Cost Accounting and Auditing Exam beginning wasn’t as dramatic as my Financial Accounting Paper, I was kind off not prepared and had a decent paper, where I did not discuss paper to avoid mood-offs. But hey, I had a ride back home with my friend Abhay with whom I have the best of conversations, and one conversation I had with Shraddha the day before, some real special moments happened before this exam.

Okay, now please bless me for next paper – Management Accounting.

Signing off, slept before blogging, so obviously would try to sit to study. Oh Wait !! FOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDD, Where are you? 😀

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Talking about pre-exam anxiety !! Dude .. I was bored to hear from people, “CA kar raha hai, full toh aajayega”, “Abbey tu toh mast hai na Accounts mein, kya tension?” from friends and my dad nicely coming near me and saying, “What’s the use of studying? You should know accounts by now!” All these statements didn’t really help me because when I opened Ainapure book to study Financial Accounts, everything came to me as latin only.

Anyways, I vaguely remember yesterday night, my whatsapp chat:

11:57am: “Yash yaar, mere lagne waaley hai, 5 chapters left and saaray important hai. I guess jaagna padega.”

about 12:20am: zzzzzzzzzzzzzz .. I am nicely dozing off on my dining table where I usually sit to study.

So I get up at 6:30 am with 2 messages from my 2 different junior college and early senior college infatuations about making her proud and doing well. I remember I am supposed to finish 5 chapters in 2 hours before I left for my Boards Centre which is so far, kind off like an “Out-station Location”. BANG ON !! I started with Internal reconstruction and Capital Reduction and all it did was freak me out. I was told before that this chapter is easy but at 6:45 am in the morning, the last thing I wanted to see is, the illustrations having company names like, “Bad-Luck Limited.”, “Hard-luck Limited.”, “Bad-Day Limited”, “Mistake Limited” and so on. For a guy like me who believes in signs, this was the worst thing to happen !!

I spent few minutes in studying as much as I can, keeping my blackberry on “Phone-Only” mode to avoid that red tempting light which makes you pick up the phone and waste minutes chatting, I shut the book. After my “Exam-Pad – Check, Ruler – Check, 2 Calculators – Check, New Pens – Check, et cetera” activities, I went for a hot water shower. (Take my free tip: Whenever in stress, go for a hot water shower, you will feel bliss and content that nothing else can match). I thought I will develop a nice ghati look for exam, unshaven face, messy hair but when I went in front of mirror, Oh my – I never knew I looked so handsome :D. Nevertheless, this is quiet a routine, I looking super good at home and as I step out, it depreciates 100% making me look crap.

Just like how Indian Government cares a damn about Rape, Adjoining society cared a damn about draught affected people nicely having rain dance yesterday celebrating Holi and wasting water, our Mumbai Railway Local cared a damn about T.Y. Board appearing students. (Wait ! The names of the company in illustrations mentioned above, was that a sign?). Thanks to 5th train which came at 10:05 am, I got in luckily and reached 10 minutes before exam.

So broken, so sweat-drenched, so tired and so annoyed. There is one thing about exam – It makes you abuse a lot. There is one thing about abusive words as well. Those words make you feel light :P.

Besides such a dramatic morning for me and some people whose centre was Sathaye College (Details about it is pasted in the photo posted below), My paper was really nice. (Maybe, illustrations were just pre-exam signs and I had a better day later).

Situation at Sathaye College during Financial Accounting Exam of T Y Bcom Boards - As captured from a friend's status on Blackberry Messenger.Software Courtesy: Screen Grabber

Situation at Sathaye College during Financial Accounting Exam of T.Y.B.com Boards – As captured from a friend’s status on Blackberry Messenger.
Software Courtesy: Screen Grabber

Today reminds me of the quote by Charlie Chaplin sent in the morning by my friend, Sahil Jobalia (Wait ! This also could be one sign about the forth-coming events).

Life is a tragedy when seen in close – up, but a comedy in long – shot.

Documenting final graduation days

My So-Important Readers, Please pray for my next papers to go well too

Signing off for a nice long nap before I begin studies for the next exam


*Slurp* *Slurp*

*om nomnomnom*

Oh yes! Here we are, I stumbled upon this contest with an amazing opening line:-

“Gran follows recipes by looking at picture—to the eye, delicious; to the tongue, boiled socks. Makes you wanna cry really.” ― Simon Cheshire, Plastic Fantastic

And here, I present – Wheat and Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Cookies, Healthy and Tasty Recipe using Fortune Rice Bran Health, A healthy choice for your heart.

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First, let’s start with an Ingredient list and be ready with everything we need to prepare the cookies:

  • 1 cup wheat flour
  • 3/4th cup Oats, toasted and powdered
  • 2/3rd cup granulated sugar, powdered
  • 1/2 cup Fortune Rice Bran Oil
  • 1 tsp. vanilla essence
  • 1 egg
  • 1/2 tsp. baking soda
  • 1/2 cup Chocolate Chips

Method:

  • Mix the Wheat Flour, powdered Oats, Chocolate Chips and baking soda. Keep it aside.
  • Mix Oil, powdered Sugar well. Add the egg and Vanilla essence, once combined and mixed properly, add the flour mixture.
  • Knead lightly to form a dough, make sure the chocolate chips do not melt while kneading.
  • Make one teaspoon sized balls of the dough, and flatten.
  • Bake at 180 degrees celcius for 10-15 minutes until they turn brown on the sides.
About to become, the final product ;) *yummm*

About to become, the final product 😉 *yummm*

Wheat and Oatmeel Chocolate Chip Cookies

Wheat and Oatmeel Chocolate Chip Cookies

———– A guest post by Kalyani Hemmady

This post is a part of Healthy & Tasty Recipe Contest with Fortune Rice Bran Health Oil & BlogAdda.com


[Urban Dictionary]

The true usage of the phrase is to claim that  you simply ‘do not know’. However, the phrase is often interpreted as ‘F?@k Nose’, which may cause offense to the listener. This misinterpretation is often replied to using ‘Cunt Face’ which is regarded as the appropriate answer.

‘What time is Adam supposed to be here?’

‘F?@k knows’

‘Only asking .. Cunt Face.’

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What do you want from life?

Are you on the right track?

Are you truly happy?

If your answer to these questions is ‘F?@k Knows!’, then this book is for you.

Find the answers to life’s most important questions with the help of uber-successful entrepreneur, Shailendra Singh, Co-founder of Percept and Inceptor of Sunburn, told with sparkling, flavourful and in-your-face humour, This book will advise you on how to:

a. Find yourself (because you’re probably lost. Admit it).

b. Follow your heart (because if you don’t then you’ll die unhappy, you stupid F?@ker).

c. Achieve your goals (You know you want to).

d. Live life like you give a F?@k (because why not?).

Candid and thoughtful, F?@k Knows will show you how to really live life on your own terms, to do what you want to do and not what you have to do just because your father said so!

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Author: Shailendra Singh

Genre: Non-Fiction

Price: Rs. 195/-

Publisher: Rupa Publications

Pages: 234

ISBN: 978-81-291-2388-6

Ratings: 4/5

Source: Google Images

Source: Google Images

THE BOOK REVIEW

               I started this book without knowing or reading synopsis or description. I thought maybe this would be a story of some guy who is screwed up, and woo-hooo taadaaa, it turned out to be a self help book.

So basically, with an In-your-face humour, Shailendra Singh, the author, keeps you glued to this book how Cartoon Network used to keep 90’s children to TV, and yet brings out that sensitive topic of life. He makes sure by his writing that you don’t get bored by listening to his whinings or advices or examples and shut the book, but let’s you stick around to know more, and himself asks the readers to take 1 to 2 chapters at a time for proper understanding.

Like so many other authors, he brings to us a manual of “How-a-life-is-to-be-lived” with more than 70 chapters touching all the aspects, from love to sex, work to smartness, karma to diet or friendship to health. He gives us a lot of examples of people who are still among us, the failures and success of them and also presents his own life journey. There are some really interesting proverbs and statements like:

Use your mind, don’t let it lose you“,

You make history when you have a passion that inspired you to wake up earlier than everyone else in the morning, keeps you awake late at night and fills every minute in between with its intensity”,

“In 90’s, Product was the king and in 21st Century, Packaging is the God”,

“Everytime you say yes to something useless, you say no to something that is bloody important”,

“When you are born, everybody is laughing and you are crying. When you die, everybody is crying, so you had better be laughing”,

Worrying is like riding a tiger. If you can stay on top of it, you will enjoy the ride. If you get off, the tiger will eat you”. et cetera.

So yes, basically he uses the language we use in our day to day lives and penetrates our mind to shake it and wake up from the deep slumber, or the “Grumpy-face disease”. He uses rash words and also goes to a level of providing number of his friend and ridicules living personality without being diplomatic or politically correct.

          After touching all the parts and topics that bothers a reasonable human being, covering as many aspects that are available, he just asks us for few things:

a. To make a “F?@k it list” – Which actually means, “The Bucket List” and jot down things you would want to do.

b. Ask yourself two main questions, “Who am I?” and “What do I want”?

c. Practice “Chi F?@k” and “Chi F?@k Po” to keep sanctity of your mind and soul.

d. Be happy, stay happy and make people happy.

The best part about the book is, when Shailendra Singh has a conversation with God. So nicely, he describes what happens with everyone of us, and how you keep deferring your dream to live and keep chanting, ‘will do it’ or ‘just do it’ but never reach to a spot where you can say, ‘just done it’. I give this book 4/5 and recommend all of you to read it once.

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Summary

Beginning: The author mesmerizes you with witty start, also on guiding how to make the maximum benefit out of it, by noting down points on “How to read this book”, followed by funny disclaimer and introduction to himself.

A little later: He makes us recollect the fact that life is short and deferment to everything is not really a great idea. He also comes out with a Math formula on estimate basis to let you know, how less a life you have remaining.

A little more later: Asks us, on how much you want to delay? when will you actually do? Asks us, who are they? they who always intervene in your happiness or ideas and put you down, or pull you down.

A little more later, when you are halfway through: The healing power of “F?@k”, The “Chi F?@k and Chi F?@k po”, Conversation with God (the best part), What goes in, must come out followed by some diet theories.

After finishing halfway, a little more later: Magnifies concepts of true love, happiness, F?@k buddies, Sex, Orgasm, Hard Work and Death.

About to finish: How your body is your temple and what you should do to preserve it, an amazing explanation on Rich/Wealthy and Fit/Healthy followed by some really nice tips

Finishing: F?@k knows if death is not as beautiful as life and F?@k knows why he wrote this book followed by acknowledgements.

With stories about him, and his experiences lingering in almost every chapter, practically proving that what he is saying are not really superficial advises.

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“Witty, Funny yet meaningful – A book to make you realize that life can indeed be beautiful and life can really celebrated each day if you follow few simple rules and stay happy.

—– Maulik Doshi, Blogger @ https://maulikonpaper.wordpress.com

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About the Author

Shailendra Singh has B.T.D.T. – Been there. Done that. Some know him as a ‘sports marketing guru’, some as an ‘advertising whizz’ or ‘Bollywood producer’, and many acknowledge him as a shrewd ‘dealmaker’. He’s conceptualized the most famous and long-lasting campaigns for India’s biggest brands, managed and helped adjust the jockstraps for India’s most respected cricketers, and launched the careers and egos of the country’s biggest celebrities. he’s opened a direct line of communication with India’s youth by creating massive music festivals, is emerging as Asia’s largest music promoter, and has produced over sixty Bollywood movies. He has worked on awareness campaigns for HIV/AIDS, cancer and piracy. He enjoys short trots on the beach, any sport that uses a ball, and sugar. This is his first, and hopefully not last, attempt at writing a book.

Source: Google Images

Source: Google Images

To The Author

I am really sorry, but after reading your book, out of over-smartness, I watched “The Human Centipede”. It’s SICK !! 😦

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This review is a part of the biggest Book Review Program for Indian Bloggers. Participate now to get free books!