Gone? Busy? Self Inflicted?

Posted: July 22, 2013 in Rantings
Tags: , , ,

This is a good sign, having a broken heart. It means we have tried for something. 

Elizabeth Gilbert (Eat, Pray, Love)

A year counted backwards from the day I had my farewell from the college where I studied commerce for 5 years, it was not new for me to listen to graduated people talking about how after college, people go on their own ways and hardly anyone remains. The one that still stay were always your good friends. At that time, I never paid heed to what they said for I thought or rather believed that with Facebook, Twitter and Whatsapp, people will always be around.

And it is almost 3 months now and I have met handful of 4-5 people from my college and spoken to some 15-20 people, albeit meaningful or proper ones with less than 10 and that makes me wonder if what they said was true? If yes, where have they gone? or are they busy? or am I busy? Is it self inflicted? Is it because I am too busy? But aren’t they doing the same thing? I tried scrolling through list and chatting with few people now and again but then do I really have things to say? Aren’t we all absorbed either in career or drowned in lack of time?

That one day, a stupid spoilt face for God knows what reason screwed my mood. Although I got over with it, what gave me a mental distress was “The missing feeling”. I texted a friend, let’s go for a dinner. It was that friend with whom I used to sit for lunch while studying in library during ipcc days and she suggested we call for everyone, to which I said, “I want to meet you only”, to which she said, no everyone would be better; something like a get together. However you interpret, it did hurt me. I texted another friend, who replied, “Finally you got time” followed by “Whatsup?” and then again I was dumbfounded for I realized, I have nothing to talk about. Almost everyone around me are either busy with job hunting or their internships or studies or self induced hibernation. If I talk about lack of time, when college was on, due to my college’s strict attendance policy, we lead more hectic life of morning college of 7 am to office till night and then reaching home. Now we do have quota for good sleep, don’t we?

There is something wrong out there, not only in the direction my write up is going but also with people. Sometimes I wonder if people whom I am expecting should contact me for I always contacted them are waiting for me to contact them? Sometimes I wonder if people faked fondness of meeting or talking to me and now since we are out of college, are away? Sometimes I wonder if everything will only be like this and I shall continue with the share of happiness that I have at my office with my colleagues who are more than very good friends of mine.

And even now, after I ended, I still wonder if people have gone or are busy or is it all self inflicted like ego or that stupid expectation of other to contact. Meanwhile, I would crash to bed – July Tax Season has already taken a toll on me (aaanchuuu .. aaanchuu) – No, I am not visiting any doc anytime soon (continues — aaanhcccu aanchuu aaanchuuu).

Goodnight, thanks for reading my undirected ranting .. will get back to meaningful post soon 😀

Source: Google Images

Source: Google Images

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Comments
  1. InnerDialect says:

    Heyyyy am missing your posts, get back :)))))))))))))))))))))))))) love your ranting, best wishes,

  2. Payal says:

    hmmm….. its kinda true but i guess this is normal,,,,,
    have u ever been in contact wid any school friend wen u were in colg? hardly 1-2, so again its d same thing…
    new people replace old ones accept for the ones who are your besties…
    life goes on my friend…..

    • Maulik says:

      Let us try to not go apart even after the life has gone ahead. Lets exploit technology and stay in touch. Let’s not get bogged down by all this, I don’t want to lose people, or anybody who were special for even one minute of my life :’)

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