Homecoming and Battle with the Ego

Posted: November 6, 2013 in Rantings
Tags: , , , , ,

And when you start feeling pointless for hoping a better and healthy tomorrow and when you make “Aakhri Alvida na ho” song from Shootout at Lokhandwala, your theme song – YOU ARE GOING MAD !!

I won’t make any sense in defining the title of this blog. However, there is a significance behind both the things – “Homecoming” and “Battle with the Ego”. Basically, these are those two emotions that I have strongly felt past few days. Let me talk about Homecoming.

How beautiful is to be back home! Past many days when I suffered at the hands of food poisoning and faced deteriorating health – time and again coupled with heavy weakness and stomach aches – the only place of solace, of calm, of feeling safe and of relief was home. Home where your mother would get so worried for you that you will need to calm her down before you could rest your body, home where your father will try to rise your spirits by motivation or scare the shit out of you by counting possibilities of hazards that could have happened, home where your elder sister will try to make those bimaaro wala khana italian or mexican using different recipes or by merely making khichdi tasty by adding oregano and Maggi Masala into it. Past one month, all my days started with me counting hours before I will be back home from work. Terrible month, seriously !

But it was not just about me. For the first time, I observed something that I failed to observe past two years since I am working. Diwali holidays were nearing and half of my colleagues were leaving city to meet their parents. The joy of getting to eat home food, the joy of getting to meet family, the joy of sleeping with your head on mom’s lap, the joy of sharing stories with your father, the joy of teasing your sister, the joy of playing with your brother, the joy of being at home. To see that joy in the eyes of your friends was something more special than having a Pizza.  Not only my own colleagues, I felt happy looking at families or a boy or a girl with heavy suitcases waiting for CST train at Andheri Station or seeing them running towards Mumbai Central Station with a haste of catching the train to visit their village home. It was always special looking at all of this. A feeling so difficult to explain.

Coming to Battle with the Ego. It has been over a month and I am still not well and so, here I have two small versions of my own self circling around my head, poking me with their decisions. One – the egotist – nagging me for being weak, or for my immunity not working, or for not getting well soon and would ask me to get up, go to work, go to meet friends, go out and forget about the illness. Probably listening to this egotist, I am still not fine – Rest needed. Second – the caring guy – who will ask me to sleep one more hour in the morning, almost making me late for work. Who would ask me to cancel plans of meeting friends at the pretext of getting more sleep. One who postponed my plans to start studies by a month by pacifying me everyday that I shall be able to study once I am well, so I need to take rest and get well fast. Probably listening to the caring guy has made me a lazy bum, such a lazy bum that even my immunity is feeling lazy to act and fight.

Anyways, a lot of randomness thrown up here. Its like I have puked in this blog post. Goodnight for now. I shall take my medicines and listen to “Aakhri Alvida na ho”.

Source: Google Images

Source: Google Images

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