Posts Tagged ‘Expectations’

       “Expectation is the mother of all fuck ups”

                      — My Psychology Professor, Final Year.

I had opted for Psychology in my last year of College and there was one time when the teacher came in class and wrote this statement in big bold letters on the black board and explained us how in our lives, we expect and we are let down; how we expect and how relationships go sour because of the same and how expectations ruin up everything around. As William Shakespeare puts it, “Expectation is the root of all heartache” – sounds more civilized now? 😉

So yes, I thought about this because today something really funny happened to me. One of my friend asked me if I wished a particular friend (a good female friend) and I said yes, at night only. She asked me what time and I said, I called her around 12:15. She then asked me if I wished this another friend of mine (a close guy friend) and I said yes, at night, I was chatting with him so wished him through whatsapp. Hardly I knew that this would lead to an argument over why didn’t I call him in spite of him being such a dear friend and why did I call her. It was funny till the time I realized that the other person was not kidding around and I told her, in male friendships we have a different bonding and we don’t act all pampering; how we act with our female friends will be different that how we act with a male friend but all that made no difference and that friend left the scene. When at the end of the day, I asked her, if she was just kidding; she replied, “No, you failed my expectations, I did not expect you to behave like this.”

Such a small matter and such a huge scene. But this makes me wonder about why things work like this? I think, we all make our own personality sketch and everyone expects us to function under those outlines that we create for ourselves. If we ever move ahead and create a benchmark, we are expected to surpass those benchmarks and create a higher one but never to step downwards or bend lower than what we are positioned at. It is not the only time but several times in past also, if one of my friend cracks an indecent joke – he would be pardoned or not be spoken about but if I crack, by mistake also, any not so indecent but bit erroneous joke, it will hurt people so bad that I will need to spend the day consoling them. This is how it works, a person will always look forward to you as a sugar candy if you are sugar coating always; a person will always anticipate you to be crude if you be rash always. Even if we claim that humans are the most adaptable specie made or we have the most developed brain; we still will go mad over any change in order or diversion from mainstream.

Recently, I went through a rough phase and rid myself of my calm demeanor. That particular phase of 2 weeks went so bad with my interpersonal relationships that I had a fall out every day and with everyone and no one cared to know why my behavior had a diversion; since people believed that I had a courage to stay calm or be happy at any situation (Sort of, taken for granted?). Sometimes, no; not sometimes, but most of the times recently, I too feel like saying what Allan Garner says in this picture below; like seriously !!

Source: Sexy Sadie's Collection in photo sharing website

Source: S. Sadie’s Collection in photo sharing website

Worst is, I don’t even know how many people and who exactly and what actually do they expect out of me; but the truth is, no one knows !!

Aah, recently I saw a picture somewhere while searching for this which read; “Why don’t you let people see good in you?” Below it was written, “Because when they see good; they expect good”. Unfortunately, couldn’t save that picture. 😦